Ever hear this at home?
“I’d do it… but I don’t really know how.”
It sounds harmless, but when “not knowing” happens often, the weight falls on one person – usually mum, partner, or the one already carrying most of the household and mental labour.
This isn’t just uncertainty. Psychologists call it weaponised incompetence – when someone avoids tasks under the guise of “I don’t know how,” leaving the other to carry both the mental and physical load.
👉 You’re scrubbing the shower… again.
👉 Folding towels “the right way.”
👉 Doing washing while everyone else relaxes.
And for many, the pressure is heavier:
- Mums of disabled or neurodivergent children, balancing therapies with endless mess
- Parents recovering from illness or injury, struggling to keep a safe, functional home
- Single parents or families with high-stress jobs, where one missed task spirals into guilt, tension, or arguments
It’s not laziness – it’s an invisible burden that unfairly falls on the person already keeping the household afloat.
Real-life examples:
- A partner avoids washing clothes, claiming they “don’t know how” to use the washing machine, or that “you do it better”
- Laundry is done poorly, forcing you to redo it
- Dishes left half-cleaned, or needing constant reminders
- You’re managing your children’s therapies and still cleaning up after everyone
These behaviours create invisible labour: reminding, correcting, and redoing tasks that should be shared.
Sources:
Weaponized incompetence is back, and it’s driving modern women out of their marriages
30 Women Share The Worst Weaponized Incompetence Examples They’ve Seen In Real Life
Most families try:
- Doing it themselves – quicker in the moment, but utterly draining over time.
- Asking for help – only to end up redoing it anyway.
- Hiring cleaners – yet still having to instruct, supervise, or remind.
When Annie first contacted us, she was skeptical. “I’ve tried cleaners before,” she said, “and I always end up paying more and doing more myself.”
We invited her to try our One-Hour Power Clean with one promise: you won’t have to add “managing the cleaner” to your list. Just a trial, no pressure, no strings, and if she didn’t like it, no need to continue.
During that first visit, we tackled what we could in an hour. After we were done, Annie noticed something different:
- We cleaned less space, but we cleaned it deeply – grout scrubbed, edges detailed, nothing skipped
- We remembered what she told us – no repeated instructions, no hovering required
- She didn’t have to supervise, correct, or redo anything
By the end of the session, Annie smiled.
She wasn’t just seeing a clean kitchen – she was feeling something she hadn’t felt in a long time: relief. No judgment about the state of things before we arrived. No need to apologize or explain. Just trust that it would be done properly, and consistency she could actually count on.
That day, she decided to make us her regular cleaners.
By the end of the session, Annie smiled. She wasn’t just seeing a clean home – she was seeing relief, trust, and consistency. That day, she decided to make us her regular cleaners.
“I love the hotel vibes at home. It’s like being loved through your home – and it’s not a battle anymore.” – Anonymous
“The last few cleans have been wonderful. It’s such a joy walking into a fresh-smelling house. I love the little details – like the folded toilet rolls and pretty flower touches – just like a posh hotel. Thank you!” – Karen A.
These stories remind us what a clean home really means: relief, comfort, and feeling cared for.
We don’t just “show up and clean.” We’ve built systems to lift the mental load too:
- You tell us once. We remember forever: Towels folded a certain way? Beds made just so? Floors done in a specific order? Our admin logs it all. You never have to repeat yourself.
- You’re not managing another person: Need something changed? Tell our admins once. You’re not chasing anyone down or wondering if the message got through.
- We clean what actually needs cleaning: Grout lines. Behind furniture. Vents. The spots everyone else skips. Our checklists catch the details you’re tired of noticing.
- We fix mistakes without the guilt: Something’s not right? We come back and make it right – no charge, no questions, no awkward conversations. You shouldn’t have to feel bad about asking for what you’re paying for.
We know what it’s like when you’re:
- Sorting through your kids’ too-small clothes at 10pm because no one else tracks what fits
- Scrubbing the shower for the third time this week while everyone else relaxes
- Managing your child’s therapy schedule and still coming home to mess no one else noticed
- Recovering from surgery and watching the house fall apart because “I don’t know how” means it won’t get done
The endless “I’ll just do it myself” moments when life is already full.
You don’t have to do it all alone.
Every visit, we bring relief. Your home isn’t just tidy – it’s deeply cared for, in every detail, so you can finally breathe easier.
